Seeing Double.

This week I have been harassed and blinded.

By unforgiveness.

I'm deceived and overcome by the tempting lie that forgiving someone means he gets to move on, scot-free and applauded by people who should love me but don't see while stumbling I bear the cost, dishonor, toil, sorrow, shame of releasing my transgressor.

For to me, it feels unfair, his freedom for my chains. How can I forgive? It feels like death.

O LORD of hosts, who tests... who sees the heart and the mind,

let me see your justice for to you have I committed my cause.

Hans gently reminded me to consider: Before God, who is more set free? Who has kept living his dying life and who has died into lasting life?

In the sight of God, Pashhur--a priest who had persecuted God's servant for speaking the true words of the LORD--is called Terror On Every Side. 

Yet to the world, it appears to be Jeremiah who represents that "Terror is on every side!"

I pray against blindness, against my worldliness.
I pray that the eyes of my heart be opened,
I pray that the double-vision be renewed.
I pray as Rebecca challenged me to when we read chapter 19:

Daddy, change our hearts. The ones that don't... see the world as You do.